Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Weeks 2 & 3 of my long pose...

Hello world, 

It seems that in the midst of my moving locations I've lost my old posts that I was going to publish here :[ It's very sad to me as I was hoping to make a daily account for each modeling day and my experiences throughout, but I will just have to settle with a weekly summary. I'm not sure if this is better or worse than my original plan.

My second week went well. One student was missing the whole time, and the others were making much progress. I was holding up with the pose, my body felt pretty good till the end of the week, when pain accumulated in my left hip. I recall that on the last day of week two I was feeling very down, very pessimistic and sore and didn't really want to be interacting with anyone. But I persevered, and by week three I was feeling rejuvenated. I try to not let my personal life stuff get in the way of my performance while modeling, but it is very challenging for life modeling, because no matter what my mind seems to circle to the dark spots. It is the nature of one with so much to learn, figure out, and do...I suppose.

So far this week has been going all right, but I do admit wishing I was done with the week already, as I am sore and tired. I have tomorrow, then week three will be over. My knees and left hip in particular are bothering me more than anything. It'll pass. Today was a bit exciting for a while though as I noticed that there was a little bright green leaf hopper bug on the stand with me. It gave me comfort and amusement, distracted me for a bit. "Which is harder for you when modeling, the physical part or the mental part?" one of the students asked me. With only a moment to think, I answered, "Mostly the mental." I struggle with feeling isolated or having lack of conversation, and sometimes my awareness of my cirling thoughts drive me...nearly mad. But that is why I do my best to chat with others when I can; though sometimes all I can do is stretch and shake myself out, and the breaks are I must make the choice to take care of my body or my mind. It's fascinating. I do enjoy it, nonetheless. Some of my favorite modeling moments have come from my life drawing/painting sessions. Mostly things people say, which can only be so funny and awesome in that moment. Even with all my aches and pains with figure modeling for artists, it's not so unbearable to me as feeling isolated in a room full of people (which sometimes does happen). In the end, the rewards of helping students, artists, and myself learn better to be better artists is what makes it worth it all.

Saturday, April 19, 2014

Long Pose - Days Three & Four - end of Week One! :]

I made it though my first week of this pose with a whole lot less pain that I was anticipating. Thank goodness! I'm pleased. I've done a few long poses before - roughly the same amount of hours only less days a week; this is the first long pose where I've held the pose four days in a row. I must say I've started out well considering how badly things seemed to be going for me physcially just before the start. Yay!

On the third day of my pose, I remember I was thinking a little more about whether or not it was true that what I'd said before that it took a good three days before my body adjusted...I was feeling  a bit  tired (though I got a full night's sleep), but not in as much pain as I anticipated. (I pretty much prepare for the worst, and am pleasantly surprised when things go well...does that make me a pessimist?...)
The studios were all full of students - I don't try to eavesdrop but when there is no music playing and no one talking in the model room, I can hear just about everything everyone says in the next room over, and a few words here and there in the next next room over - and I was wishing I was a part of the school rather than just another model. Spirits lifted later, and I went on a walk to grab coffee after my session  and was called from across the street from a woman in a car. on my walk back...who turned out to be my cousin! Craziness aside, we chatted on the side of the road for a bit and I felt very glad to have run into her. I do have family resting at the glorious Mountainview Cemetery and it turned out she was leaving from visiting them just when she recognized me on the side of the street....what a treat! :P

Thursday, the fourth day of my pose. I was feeling it. I was in pain, at least at the end of the session. But I was able to hold it together. I kept thinking - "Don't quit on them and the won't quit on you". That is my modeling mantra. That is why I get upset when people pack up and leave in the middle of my pose...unless they've stated that they need to do so for some reason. But with no reason stated and no warning, when people pack and leave when I'm still standing naked and bothers me to nearly no end. This never happens at the GGA, but I am making note that it has happened at other venues and I am so glad for it no happening at this school. They don't quit on me. I won't quit on them.
It was just me and the students this day; they seem to be progressing well and when I look at their drawings I wish I could say something that would be meaningful or supportive, but I struggle to know what to say so I stay silent. 

After my long pose session I went to do a photoshoot in SF with a traveling photgrapher. It was positive! I'm grateful he took the opportunity to work with me. I see a new connection here. 

These are my favorites:


Okay good night all, I'll be writing to you again next week. 

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Long Pose - Days One & Two :]

 *Not my image; see caption on photo*

I am two days into my long pose at the GGA and feeling very good about it so far! :] I found an image of a drawing that is sort of similar to the pose I am doing just so you get an idea - but perhaps later you will see better images, and of me [: I'm doing a standing pose, rear-view, and wondering what the students will decide to do about my tattoo...haha. If the lighting is similar to the image about then it won't be very noticeable...not that it matters to me, I like my tattoo and hope others do too.

I had my modeling session Monday, bright and early (3.5 hours) and after we fussed with figuring out the pose I held it for the remainder of the time. So far the pose feels good, no pains on that first day at all. I was a little worried because I am putting weight on my left knee/leg - the one with the 
scar tissue - but I am able to counter the weight on my right leg when I need to. I was impressed with how confidently the students started out their drawings! They sure know how to use their time effectively :] It will be fun to see them progress in their drawings and paintings. I admit being a little envious because I want to be drawing and painting too!

After my session Monday I went for a walk to stretch out and move my tired leg muscles and grab coffee. It's been lovely outside here lately, and it felt nice to get my mind and eyes stimulated again (after hours of mostly staring in one spot and listening to the sounds of charcoal rubbing paper and shuffling feet, I start to feel a little stir crazy). Again I enjoyed the sun when I returned to my home base, eating my lunch slowly and relaxing before heading out to work in Lafayette. 

Today was a bit different. I woke earlier than my alarm, and felt twinges of pain in my left hip already. I was worried, again, but had some ibuprofen handy and by the time I was modeling again I felt okay. I took a nap after lunch, when I was back at my home base, which I am not sure was the best thing to do because I will still need to be in bed by 10pm (!) I am feeling the tension in my left hip a bit, but it is not unbearable yet. I joked with one of the students that it takes about three days of a pose for me to really know and feel the damage it might do to my body. Kind of true, so, we'll see how tomorrow goes. I've been doing well so far, I'd hate to start having troubles when I still have four more weeks of this to go. When I am complete with this pose, it will be the longest pose I've done yet, totaling 65 hours of my life dedicated to the training artists. WoO!

In the meantime, expect to see more updates. I was thinking of blogging every day about my experience modeling for the day :] hopefully that won't get too repetitive. I'd love it if anyone asked me questions about my figure modeling or anything else they'd like to know to help get my posts jogging [:

Till next time! ♥

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Scar Tissue

Back again with a follow up for my last post...turns out I have a lump of scar tissue. I was very pleased when my doctor went through the effort to make my x-ray appointment happen but disappointed with her lack of advice to how to DEAL with the scar tissue. She only advised me to let her know if it got larger or more tender. Not to worry though, as I've been doing my own reading and looking around to see what is to be done about it. (And, of course, if anyone reading this has experience with going through the process of removing scar tissue that's been causing pain and immobility, please share :))
It seems that the course of action is to break up the scar tissue to be reabsorbed by my body manually and then strengthen the ligaments/muscle surrounding the area. I'll be looking into the possibility of working with some kind of physical therapist. In the mean time, I guess I will be aware and gentle with my left hasn't been painful for several days now, which is great, but I still have some difficulty touching my left heel to the back of my leg (er, butt) without it pinching some. I would really love for the discomfort to be gone...

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